Falling in love with my whole self
self-awareness is an investment.
With age, comes the knowledge of self-awareness, something your teen years most suffered from lack of it. To be self-aware — to me — is to know our flaws, qualities, and whole self deeply in order to learn to change and reprogram the channels of our brain. Self-aware is acceptance.
Part of my evolution is to be aware of myself. It can sound narcissistic, but after I turned 30, the person I've become most interested in about to get to know me better, and I wish I had known sooner. Humans are often confident that they know everything about themselves; we are wrong more often than we think.
I told my partner that everyone who turns 30 should win a 2-year therapy program that they are obliged to attend once a week. One hour a week to talk about you sounds like a nightmare for the vast majority, but the world would undoubtedly be a better place. Evolution is part of the environment, yet it doesn't seem to be part of human nature.
Like everyone, you need to make peace that you have a flexible identity. You are neither a GOOD or a BAD person, thin or fat. You simply are. You have good days, bad days, and ok days and understanding this flexibility can result in less self-hate and better self-awareness. The hardest part is to embrace the multitudes that live within us.
Most people feel like they know themselves pretty well. But what if you could know yourself just a little bit better? For me, to change is to evolve. And changing from the inside out requires a transparent honesty that most are unwilling to pay the price. When we focus on ourselves, we evaluate and compare our current behavior to our internal standards and values, which results in a real authenticity. — "Without self-awareness and the ability to manage our emotions, we often unknowingly lead from hurt." Brené Brown
All of us have had a moment in our life when we deprived ourselves of doing something; once again, women are a bigger target for it because there are always some standards of beauty that you are not meeting. For example, no one ever says to themselves, "you've got an eating disorder," but once you make a list of everything you put in your mouth that day, only consume content about food, losing weight rapidly, the ideal body figure, etc. And you know that's probably not right, but then again, there are so many blogs, TikTok's, everywhere saying that that's what you should do; it's almost impossible to admit there's a problem with it. We all have a friend who has been there. It's a gymnastic to try to rationalize your way out of it.
As I become more self-aware of my body, it doesn't mean I am free from others' expectations, but I learned to accept and love what is only mine.
This week I went to the gym wearing a top and shorts only. I couldn't believe I'd become someone confident enough to put it off. I always thought I never had the body for it—whatever this means—but now I have enough confidence to love what I have.
(Slippers+Top+Shorts+Smoothie on my right hand+My phone on my left hand+Sunglasses=I'm ready to be part of Kendall & Haley club.)
What's the most significant barrier for you in being really true to yourself about what you are doing, feeling, or thinking? I believe it's always related to what collides with your identity. When something strikes with our identity, it gets harder and harder to see, and you start to explain and justify your actions because you can't accept you are not the person you claim to be. — "Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become. No single instance will transform your beliefs, but as the votes build up, so does the evidence of your new identity." James Clear.
Lack of awareness often leads to anxiety and fear, where you understand things are correlated. Still, it's not easy to separate all the different layers behind them, which result in feelings/moods. It's HARD to recognize what you are really experiencing. You think you are being honest with yourself when in fact, you are lying to yourself. How to stop your confidence-killing habits and learn to love who you are? Self-hate it's the easy way out, but self-development is your best investment!
Nothing is sexier than falling in love with ourselves. Remember, your first love is your self-love. It's impossible to change anything until we accept it, and the only way to improve in other areas is by developing a keen level of self-awareness so that you can examine the contents of your consciousness. It's cool (and scary) to be aware of you.
🟠 #INTERNETFINDS: weekly things worth sharing and consuming 🧠
We’re Going Somewhere Worse ➞ “Self-care” can mean a lot of things these days.
Marriage Requires Amnesia ➞ Relationships are complicated, and that’s the best (and worst) part of it.
Favorite Podcast of The Week ➞ Developing identity-based habits and how we can become the architects of those habits, not the victims of them.
Atomic Habits ➞ “Goals are good for setting a direction, but systems are best for making progress.”
Jlo - Love Don't Cost a Thing ➞ What I need from is not available in stores
“You know who’s going to give you everything? Yourself.” Diane von Fürstenberg