Nobody queues for a flat roller coaster.
Feeling overwhelmed but happy and great, and also chaotic.
After a six-month break, I am back for good and hopeful that you missed me. And if you didn't, please stay - I am very needy at the moment. My disappearance was due to..
Let's start by saying that I arrived at my parents' house with a two-month visit planned, but it didn't end until after six. A woman in her 30s living with her parents for six months may go two different ways, by either becoming their parents or a temporary teen again. If you're curious to read more about this story, please leave a comment below so I can relive this "trauma", knowing it's for a good cause of entertainment and sharing my key learnings from this experience. In other words, I needed a break from myself - also known as self-sabotage.
Self-sabotage, according to Google: An example of conscious self-sabotage is deciding to eat cake, despite a goal to eat healthily. Unconscious self-sabotage happens when a personal purpose or value has been undermined but not initially recognized. - I plead guilty for both!
Sabotage is related to insecurity which can reflect as a procrastinating act. And procrastination is rarely laziness. As Julia Cameron says - "It is fear. Call it by its right name, and forgive yourself." - a punch in my stomach.
I am (still) a timid creator who has been living side by side with fear for the past two years. And after a six months break, I understood that this feeling might never go away. The 'leave it for later' is often less about time management and more about dealing with your emotions.
Procrastination is never on your to-do list, but it will show up eventually, for one reason or another, and that's when all gets complicated. I caught myself swimming in a sea of fear, self-sabotaging, and of course, procrastinating. And then I drowned for good. But where was my self-compassion during these times? (She is still missing).
Have you ever caught yourself in the same situation? My brain constantly tries to convince me that I am not a writer and that no one is reading this or anything I create. It's complicated.
We can't be the only ones responsible for reminding ourselves of our worth; it's so important to surround yourself with people who respect your moment without letting go of your hand. Encourage others by praising someone's great work, compliment your friend's outfit when you like it instead of being quiet, tell someone how much you miss them. And, of course, don't let your creator friend forget that although she works alone, her work is not in vain.
The most underrated acts can result in meaningful effects. If I feel I can impact at least one person, isn't it worth it? Imposter syndrome is a real deal, that internal experience of believing that you are not as competent as others perceive you to be. You can only beat a problem by acknowledging and accepting it. I know I am not alone.
Thank you for still being here. I promise we have an incredible roller coaster to live by and evolve together through this content. It's not always easy to write, even though it is fulfilling afterward. I am alive, still hunted by many fears, but overall, super excited.
🟠 #INTERNETFINDS: things worth sharing and consuming.
Gender Equality Remains Frustratingly Elusive. ➞ A study used sensors to show that men and women are treated differently at work.
Which Women Do We Choose to Believe? ➞ Heard and Depp have presented a harrowing picture of their brief yet turbulent marriage.
Must Listen To This Podcast Episode ➞ The pressure to overachieve.
Recipe: Pro Chefs Upgrade Instant Ramen ➞ If you are feeling lazy but still want to cook something fast and delicious.
HAIM - I'll Try Anything Once (The Strokes cover) ➞ g o o s e b u m p s!
I AM BACK! And remember: You can’t change the conditions, but you can change your response to the condition.